About Me Today...

They say it is my birthday on Tuesday. I have never spent much time celebrating my birthday and was slightly embarrassed when I moved to the Netherlands and found out how much the Dutch LOVE birthdays. I mean really LOVE birthdays. I was amazed. People came out of the woodwork giving me 3 kisses(gotta love the Dutch for making it 3 kisses instead of 2) and singing Lang zal ze leven to me. They would wish me Hartelijk gefeliciteerd - and heck they would even congratulate me on my Mother's birthday. If you want to celebrate your birthday, go to Holland.

So, in the past 10 years I have been trying to make more of an effort to appreciate a good birthday. Kids help. I still am incredibly embarrassed having attention focused at me though. Parties scare me and singing even more.

I have truthfully been dreading this birthday. Turning 40 is turning 40 - a milestone, a celebration, a new decade of being 40 and fabulous. Turning 41 is just well...turning 41 and accepting the fact that I am in my 40's now and the hoopla is over. Turning 41 and being a mom of an infant is even more mind blowing..and tiring. I sometimes think my Grandma is laughing at me from heaven and thinking "my word - I was a grandmother of TWO at your age..what are you thinking??"

Sure 40 is the new 30 and all that jazz, but it doesn't remove my wrinkles or color my gray hair, tighten my changing skin or remove the cellulite on my thighs. I see myself now as 2 generations away from kids and how it is harder to relate or even recognize myself in the young coeds in our neighborhood. I don't look like them anymore, even though I may feel like one of them. Most of them see me as their mom and sometimes when I have Astrid out for a walk if they wonder if I am her grandma.

It's weird getting older. Not bad. Just weird. I still feel 17 even if no one else sees me that way.
xoxo, t

O Christmas Tree...

The Girls picked the Tree and decorated all by themselves this year. I believe it is the cutest Chuck Brown-esque Tree EVER.











xoxo,t

Mary Did What??

The Nativity in 2009..

Eloise "Hey mom - we can't figure out who Joseph is."

Me "He is one of the guys."

Eloise "We know that - but there are like 6 guys here, which one is he?"

Me walking into the room "Well, these 3 look like kings or wise men, and these 3 are shepherds - so he must be one of the shepherds."

Eloise "Do we need a Joseph anyway because isn't God really His dad - why isn't God on this thing. Is Joseph really His step dad or what?"

Esther(randomly) "Is this the same Mary that is in the lamb song? I don't think she is married she is just a kid who has a little lamb."

Eloise "Well, I don't we should just use any of these guys without knowing who the real Joseph is. I am not doing it. We cannot just use any Joseph."

Esther "Why don't we just use a different guy each day - the green shepherd today, the blue king tomorrow. They can just take turns with Mary."

Merry Christmas.
t.

Holiday Memories...

I have watched my fill of old Holiday movies this week. All of the usual suspects - White Christmas, Miracle on 34th Street, It's a Wonderful Life...

I have found myself bawling during all of these. Bawling.

All I can see in these movies are my grandparents. I see them in the 40's and 50's - young and vibrant, thin and active with their dark hair...my grandpa with his greased back perfectly combed hair and my grandma with her bobby pins, pin curls and finger waves. They loved the holidays and celebrated surrounded by their many friends and large family.

Music filled the basement, while the drinks flowed and people danced. Couples kissed under the mistletoe.

I remember being a very little girl on Christmas morning in their very small living room stuffed full of people, presents and paper.

This is our first Christmas without them both. The family home of 56 years is sold. As happy and joyous as the Holidays are, I miss them. Their Christmas card was always the first addressed each year. Kenneth and Lorraine St. Marie, 22xx....their address remains at the top of my list. So strange not to send them one this year for the first time ever. So strange to not receive one.

Although we are staying put this Christmas, I know I have my childhood home to go to when I can. I weep for my mom this year who doesn't.

We are staying home to make new memories for our kids. For them to wake-up Christmas morning in their beds, to race down the stairs to see if Santa came. To lounge in our PJ's.

Happy Holidays to all of you. Hug your kids, honor your Grandparents and thank your parents. No matter near or far, celebrate your families and the memories you are making every day.
xoxo,t

Because I couldn't help myself...

..it is the most obvious thing to do this Season...but I am short on time to write...(and no pictures of Jed on my laptop...)

Enjoy...

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

xoxo,t

Snowfall..

We finally had our first big snow of the season last week.

It was then I realized that my daughter has a really long tongue.

xoxo,t